How is it that we love? Where does it come from and what does it mean?
Can anyone out there really define love?
Passion, Happy, Joy, Elation, Friendship... Falling, pain, confusion, frustration...

"I don't even know what love is." I heard that from him. Yet, he has said he loves me. Does that mean he doesn't? Someone else out there has had to have heard that from the person they care about most. The person they love.

Well I know what love is for me. I don't feel like describing it though. Just suffice to say that I feel it in different forms. Each for a different person, family, lover, friends... They are just different feelings. But when you mix those levels of love... You have what I feel for that one special person.

To love someone means you are willing to grow and change for and with them. In some type of way. Whether you do it for the rest of your lives... or if you do it for a month. A relationship that holds some kind of love is a learning experience in loves to come later.

I have the love that I want. I don't think it could go deeper. But what to do when things are unsure... What to do when our minds stray and we think about other possible routes.

After all we are young...

But so what I say! Yes we are. So we are lucky to be able to have found we what we have now. I sit here and think... what if our future doesn't involve eachother. And the whole balance of my world shifts. Not in a bad way... but in way that doesn't seem possible.

What if we stay together today... and tomorrow. The we have last two more days. Just because we did it doesn't mean we are signing a marriage license. All of you out there who fear what you have... Why do you do that?

Because we are young? Because we are supposed to be acting a certain way? Being in a mature relationship is a step towards maturity. So if you don't want that be honest.

If fresh and total indepence from anyone is what you want... well you will never obtain it. You will always have others to consider, unless you are that cold hearted. You will never keep things fresh. This is life. We age and learn from the fresh so we can develop into the knowing and wise.

What do you care? Fuck if you do. Fuck if you don't.

I was thinking... maybe we let it get settled but that doesn't mean it is just me who is doing it...

Love... it can lead to pain. It always does in some way. But is the love worth saving in order to grow and mature?

Fuck.