heart ache

yea... i think that needed to be said and to get it off my chest. Not sure what to do now...cause the anger and pain is gone in the few moments of sleep i procured. The few moments when i was numb to everything.
Silence... sweet beauty and redemption in the two hours of sleep I managed. Only to see my phone and realize...my eyes were open not shut and I was just so shut down...
I love you...
For all that it means. Right or wrong. I do. And i wanted you to hold me and soothe those pains that you caused. And right now I want to grasp onto you desperately and never let go or look back...
So tired.